


Bad Luck Follows (Revised)

by Soloh



Category: Outlander, Outlander & Related Fandoms, Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-12
Updated: 2018-11-03
Packaged: 2019-07-30 00:53:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16275839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Soloh/pseuds/Soloh
Summary: Same story just a little cleaned up.They didn't like each other. Trouble always seemed to arise whenever Jamie and Claire's paths crossed but slowly their relationship was growing, a bond forming.





	1. Chapter 1

The Laird of Broch Tuarach was a very lonely man. He filled his hours hunched over ledgers that cramped his hands and blurred his eyes, along with  back breaking farmwork, his own and others, that were always never ending. But his heart craved the distraction from men in coats of crimson and family woes that he didn’t mind the strain. And then he met a woman.

 

She was a widower who came to him destitute and penniless, secrets abound, with nothing but her skills as a healer to offer in trade for shelter. She was also very English with an opinionated mind and mouth of all that he was that the laird returned in kind.

 

James Fraser and Claire Beauchamp did not get along.

 

Yet, as much as they tried to avoid one another their paths always crossed. A broken fence, a broken finger to a leaky roof and now an open wound. Trouble always seemed to arise whenever they were near each other, but Jamie did his duty to help his tenant, albeit begrudgingly and Claire being a healer did hers. For nearly a year their relationship was this and nothing more to them but slowly it was growing, a bond forming.

 

____

 

_Present day_

 

Jamie was having an evening ride through the muddied glade seeking distraction from his ever ruthless thoughts and failing as they creeped their way to the forefront. So occupied was he that let his horse, Donas, lead him to wherever he pleased, finding a path that his master was terribly familiar with that snapped Jamie back to the present from one trouble to another.

 

There was her cottage that once was a slanted, ill-repaired, stoutly thing set to collapse and rot away without a loving touch until she came to live within it’s walls. Though it was still a stoutly sight. _The widow, the witch, the healer_ ,  she went by many names but to him she was simply, _Sassenach_.

 

As Jamie rode closer he felt a shiver run up his spine all too familiar. He turned around the corner of a tree abd saw the Sassenach for a split moment on the roof, her mop of brown curly hair spilling from their pins and framing her face that held a satisfied smile.

 

“What in God’s name is that woman -” He didn’t get to finish because said woman was rolling off the roof, skirts in the air, landing on the ground with a sickening thud. Jamie, hands near white as they graped the reins, took his heels to Donas that sent the steed in a furious gallop.

 

____

 

Claire’s heart was thrashing an erratic beating of shock that echoed alongside her lungs where the wind had been properly knocked from her. But it was her arm sharply throbbing in a pain that left her blood and breath an afterthought.

 

Despite her bodies protest to except fate and lay where she fell for all eternity, Claire willed herself to a sitting position, her hand grasping tight to her injury. She tried to evaluate her injuries but her hair had escaped it’s bindings and gathered in front of her face just so that even shaking side to side did nothing, only intensify the booming in her head. And that also thundered the ground beneath her.

 

It was then Claire lifted her head, where in between the thick veil of tendrils she saw hooves at full advance and a blinding shine of red coming straight for her.

 

_Of all the bloody times…_ Claire inwardly groaned.

 

Whipping off his horse, Jamie kneeled down to her and asked frantically, “Are ye alright, Sassenach?”

 

“I’ve been better. I did just fall off a roof is all,“ Claire replied with annoyance, shaking her head once more in a vain attempt to see past the curls but gave up as dizziness began to spot her eye.

 

“Sit still or ye’ll cause more damage to yerself,” Jamie ordered. He gathered her hair aside then tentatively moved his fingers up and down her arm, feeling for a break but stopped once he saw blood flowing from her hand. “Ifrinn,” Jamie muttered. Claire followed his gaze and saw a small gash in her right hand, not even an inch wide but deep and oozing blood.

 

“I have to go to my surgery- my things -” Claire made to raise herself but Jamie instead grabbed a grubby handkerchief from his pocket and before she could remark about the cleanliness of it, began to wrap it tight around her wound.

 

“What were ye doing on the roof, Sassenach?” Jamie asked harshly as his grip on her wrist tightened.“ What possessed ye -”

 

“What possessed me was that there was a bloody leak!” Claire spat with a face an ever deepening shade of fuming anger. “The same leak you were supposed to have fixed a month ago! For three days we’ve had rain and I’ve had the beginnings of a small pond in my home.”

 

“Why in Gods name dinna ye ask for my help, woman?” He gave her an exasperated look as he finished his ministrations, the blood seeping through, slowly leaving a small patch of dark red against the faded fabric.

 

“I watched you the last time you fixed it, and when the damn thing began to pour again I thought I could improve upon it.” Claire was equally as annoyed and in no mood to be reprimanded.

 

She pulled away from his grasp and held her palm firm to lessen the flow of blood but only managed to pull at her arm. “Bloody H. Christ!”

 

“Aye, and now that ye’ve improved upon it ye’ve broken yer arm and given yerself a nasty gash to boot. How ye dinna break yer neck is Gods blessing.” _Or the devils,_ he thought, holding back a smirk.

 

“Your legs - can ye stand?”

 

Claire moved her legs a bit and felt around her sides to take in stock of any other injuries. Finding none but aches she gave a weary nod to Jamie, finding no joy in needing his assistance, who carefully held her up. She swayed feeling light headed, her bruised legs straining but stayed on her feet (she would suffer no more embarrassment by being carried) with Jamie’s arm locked across her waist, keeping her steady.

 

They walked through the back door of Claire’s home, an open space that was both living quarters and surgery that smelled of earth and the lingering dampness of rains that led to her fall. Jamie settled her on a dark wood tabletop where she examined her patients then went to her cabinet with it’s wee drawers and shelves of cures that could be worse then the illness itself.

 

“Where’s that wee vial ye like to use on me, Sassenach? Ye ken the one that can split a man’s tongue to keep from howling.“ Jamie tried to keep his voice as measured as he could even though the chance to repay Claire for all the times she had doctored him, with her biting remarks of a Scots unfailing and quite unrivaled stupidity, pleased him greatly.

 

Claire felt her body stiffen, having experienced the healing pleasure of the innocuous liquid herself and gave Jamie a knowing glare to what she was sure was filling his mind with glee. "You know exactly which one it is, Fraser.”

 

Jamie’s mouth quivered, veering on the cusp of a wide beaming grin, and his hovering hand went straight to the vial that seared the sin of foolery to a healing. He then began rummaging for proper bandages and as directed her tools for suturing wrapped in leather in the drawers, turning her carefully stored order to chaos that caused Claire’s teeth to grind off the edge.

 

“Stop, you’re making more of mess then me and I’m spilling blood all over my floors. Let me.” She stood, determined to patch herself up before he caused any more disorder.

 

Jamie glanced her way and down to the floors. It was an over statement but aye, Claire was making a small mess of herself along her sleeve and turning a bit pale too that had him frowning.

 

“Back on yer rear, Sassenach, or you’ll be addin’ a cracked skull to yer list of injuries.” If she hadn’t been swaying Jamie was sure Claire would’ve socked him one solid and with her hair in a great riot and blood on her person she did rather look like a valkyrie back from battle.

 

Jamie adjusted the collar of his shirt and pulled out his flask of whisky and handed it to her knowing from experience a dousing of the amber drink was needed. Claire looked dubiously at it. She had her own stock, good too, but the whisky was there in front of her and.. Oh she might as well. She drank a generous amount letting the whisky warm her to a boneless state where her face plainly gave her away that Jamie’s was better.

 

Claire gave him his flask back ignoring the Scots smug grin.

 

“Now, tell me what to do and try not to enjoy it too much.” Jamie strained to keep the corner of his lips from curling, very aware that her good hand was well within range for gouging.

 

Damn him for finding this amusing, Claire thought crossly and narrowed her eyes at him.

 

“I could say the same to you, Fraser.“ She replied haughtily and straightened to ready herself to his  meandering touch.

 

“First you must clean the wound with a _drop_ ,” Claire emphasized, “from the vial…”

 

___

 

 

Jamie’s workmanship would leave a scar, Claire noted, but overall it wasn’t a bad job for a man with big hands. Jamie seemed rather pleased with himself after it was all over, though the actual stitching up process had him less so. He had showed a thoughtful concern for her that was surprising and irritating all at once, always double checking with her to see if he was doing it right and making the whole process longer than necessary.

 

Claire’s left arm, thankfully wasn’t broken. Damn lucky, Jamie had remarked but she did have a sprain with deep bruising that covered the length of it. With Claire’s guidance once more he wrapped the tender limb and made a sling with the same gentleness he displayed with her hand.

 

Claire now sat in her one chair that didn’t creak, rubbing her good hand against the scratchy fabric that bound her. She let her eyes fall on Jamie over by the hearth with sleeves rolled up as he put the last log in the fire.

 

“Have ye no more wood, Sassenach?” His voice was soft in asking. Wanting a peace if only for a moment.

 

Claire shook her head, her own tone calm as his. wanting a moment where a single word or look didn’t  set off the other. “I hadn’t the opportunity to cut any, what with the rain and all.”  

 

Jamie nodded and stretched his back before heading out the door.

 

“Where are you going?”

 

“To cut wood. Canna leave an injured lass to do so now can I?”

 

And with that, out the backdoor he went where Jamie found Donas, who, having free reign from his master, had round the side of the cottage where Claire’s garden laid, gorging himself on every stalk and blade of leaf that her hand had lovingly touched.

 

"Right, double the wood then ya wee bastard.” Jamie  rolled his shoulder, tight and sore, and got to work.

 

___

 

 

Jamie brought in the last log and placed it softly by the fireplace, careful to not disturb Claire, who had a blanket around her now, dozing off to the flickers of flames he had stoked for her. Her hair was still a great storm, bits of leaves in spots that he was proud for not pointing out, with the light dancing over her curls and giving them a richer shade. They framed her face that was peaceful now, the color returning to her cheeks in a comely blush, with her chest rising gently with every breath that escaped from her parted pink lips. Claire was quite the sight when not cross with him, Jamie admitted as he gazed at her. Removing a few leaves from her hair, he let her be.

 

After one last task that had him heaving a bucket of water, Jamie crossed the room to wash his hands in the basin, careful of his footsteps. But he was a big man and careful as he had been with the floorboards, they were old and unwilling to be silent anymore to his heavy weight.

 

Claire woke with a start at the noise but settled when she saw Jamie, a sheepish grin marking his face. “You’re still here.”

 

“Aye, just finished stocking yer wood. I’ll be outta yer hair after I wash up,“ Jamie said and began making quick work of scrubbing the dirt from his hands.

 

Claire shook her head, without thankfully any of the dizziness. “I only meant that I’m glad you hadn’t left  so I could thank you properly. You’ve done so much for me -” that’s when Claire noticed the water he had put to boil. “That too?”

 

“For yer washin,” Jamie stated simply.“It’s my duty to ye - to all my tenants,” he quickly corrected, “to help where I can and ye needed it today.” Jamie finished washing, dried his hands on his kilt.

 

“Yes and I’m grateful. I don’t know how I would have managed stitching myself up in my state, much less wood chopping and lugging water.” Claire flexed her fingers of her stitched up hand.

 

“About managing.” Jamie walked over to where she sat, tapping his fingers against his leg."I was thinkin’ I could send wee Rabbie to tend to ye, that is untill ye get back proper use of yer arm. He’s a braw lad, good in the kitch as he is in the fields too.”

 

“Mr. Fraser thank you truly for all that you’ve done but  really now I’m not an invalid -“

 

"I ken your capable but don’t be fool heided. Yer full of whisky and feeling light as a cloud, but come mornin’ lass ye’ll be aching from head to toe and won’t be leavin’ that bed, not even out of revenge for today.” That earned him a half smile that left Jamie with a pleasantness.

 

“Think of it as payment for my tending to ye, Sassenach.”

 

Claire mulled over his words and decided Jamie was right. Just the thought of having to tend to all her chores…

 

“As you wish.” Claire agreed. “I think I just may need the help for a couple days. Thank you.”

 

“Good. I thought I’d have to convince ye with one of our more livelier debates but I’m glad the fall gave ye some good sense.”

 

“You can be a right arse you know, Fraser.” Claire’s tone held only mild irritation even as they were falling back on familiar ground. “When I’m better I’ll give you an earful if you wish.”

 

“I’d expect nothing less from ye, Sassenach.” Jamie said as he stretched his shouder.

 

“Is your shoulder bothering you again?” Claire had set it a few weeks before when Jamie had dislocated it breaking in his brute of a horse. “I have some oil on the top shelf that will be of use.” Claire was already unwrapping herself from the quilt when Jamie made the long stride to her cabinet once more, grabbing the green vial up on the top shelf, remarking -

 

“Ye don’t rest do ye, Sassenach, bloodied and bruised as ye are?”

 

“There’s no other way for me to be.” And Jamie knew that all too well.

 

“A reckless wee thing ye are.” He shook his head and speaking sincerely he continued, “Fortune was with ye that I was around today but who kens ‘bout yer next tumble.”

 

Claire rolled her eyes, missing his tone. “I wouldn’t dream of repeating the days events with you as my shining knight.

 

"That we agree on.” Jamie answered curtly and abruptly went to the door with Claire wondering what she had said. But then he hesitated at the entry, fingers tapping at his thigh that she knew signaled a mind at work.

 

With a sharp inhale, Jamie looked over his shoulder. “I hope the 'morrow brings ye a better day. Sleep well, Sassenach.” He didn’t bother waiting for a reply as he bent his head under the door frame when she spoke.

 

“Thank you, Mr. Fraser. I hope the same for you as well.” Claire gave a courteous smile to Jamie who had turned once more her way and nodded back. As he closed the door and made her way to the bed that was shielded with a partition sheet. She threading her fingers through her hair, meeting tangles, leaves, and God help her a twig, Claire pulled out a hand mirror that laid on her small nightstand and saw a medusa staring back at her.

 

“Oh, Christ! He’ll never let this go will he?”

 


	2. Chapter 2

Since that moment of tending that had been a stain for one and an amusement to the other, Claire nor Jamie had seen each other, much to their outwardly liking. They only knew about the happenings in the others lives from Rabbie MacNab - Claire’s appointed helper - who would chatter away with barely a gasp for air and neither bothered to dissuade him from doing so.

 

And it was the lad who passed along to Claire of how word of her unfortunate fall had spread like wildfire to every ear within a holler. From the noon time babble between crofters wives, to whoops of laughter from their men in the fields, it could all be traced to a certain blithering arse, that Claire called Jamie under a scowling breath.

 

But soon enough the scowl would turn into a face splitting grin.

 

___

 

It had been almost a full week of confinement for Claire to her little humble home but she was saved from the long dull hours by a mop of mousy brown hair.

 

Rabbie was a sweet lad who would come early in the morning with a smile on his face - usually with a smear of jam and buttered crumbs along it - and the latest gossip overheard that spilled innocently from his lips. Today was no different.

 

He was sitting across from Claire tying bundles of herbs, that tickled at his nose, begging for a sneeze, with twine that she stacked and sorted with her free hand in piles for him. Rabbie was talking away when his words got ahead of him and let loose and incident involving the laird and his escaped sow.

 

Claire had stopped her sorting as she recalled a hefty piglet, with a penchant for gnawing on wood, weeds and fingertips, that had been given to her by a patient in exchange for payment. She had quickly gifted the piglet to a lovely woman named Mrs. Fitz, who just so happened to be employed as cook at Lallybroch, thinking they would soon have a supper of tender pork to fill their stomach’s and thought nothing more of it.

 

Apparently, she had been wrong as the sow still lived and had tripled in size and appetite.

 

She had chewed her way out of her pin hellbent on exacting revenge for the indignity of being locked away, biting and chasing anyone or thing that threatened to contain her. After many failed attempts to do so, that Rabbie had observed from his perch atop the chicken coop, Jaime and his men had been able to gain the advantage by cornering her against the barn with a rake in each of their hands. It looked as if the ruckus were over but then the beastly thing let out a guttural screech as she charged straight for Jamie that had him tossing the rake (that the pig chomped in two) and jumping in to a wagon full of hay as if the devil himself were at his heels.

 

“The laird was howlin’ somethin’ awful tryna keep the bessom from chompin’ at his toes.“ Rabbie told Claire with a toothy smile as he remembered the spittle of curses that Jamie spat that Rabbie would use for another day.

 

"But it was my da,” he beamed proudly, “Who threw the rag o'er her eyes and was able to tackle her wi’ five - no six - other men for she is a big one, Mistress.” Rabbie in awe stretched his arms out wide in display. “And tha’ is joost her rump.”

 

Claire, who had managed to keep silent through Rabbie’s retelling, was now in a fit of red cheeked giggles that shook her ribs, that still held lingering aches, as she imagined the tall strength of the man, James Fraser, running for his life out of fear over a pig. She now had some good dirt on the man to combat his retelling of her fall and tucked that bit of information safely away.

 

“Dinna tell the laird I told ye, Mistress.” Rabbie asked once he realized he let his mouth run away with him again and if his father found out that he was gossiping about the laird of all people…

 

Claire held up her good arm, barely restraining the laughter that was bubbling within her. “I solemnly swear the laird will not know that this came from you.”

 

Rabbie let out a relieved exhale that stirred the bitty leaves of rosemary and sage that littered the table that traveled to his nose with an itch and loud, “Achoo!”

 

____

 

Jamie was digging away at the base of a rotting tree stump with wee Rabbie watching off to the side when he got his dose of storytime from him as well.

 

According to the boy, Claire had still been open to seeing patients for minor needs but they had kept away for her to heal, leaving Claire in restless idlement. _A dangerous thing,_ Jamie noted with a chuckle. But her sole visitor that morning had been from Laoghaire Mackenzie. That name alone was enough to bring Jamie to a standstill.

 

The girl had been fidgeting from foot to foot at the doorway of Claire’s surgery with her hands clasping and twisting her green dress to a wrinkly mess.

 

“The outhouse is joost behind ye?” Rabbie had told her, not wanting the girl to dirty up the floor he had just swept. Laoghaire’s face had gone the color of beets with nostrils flaring wide and mouth opening for an assault that would’ve reminded Rabbie why he wished to be a monk, when Claire came up behind him and promptly shooed him out. Not one for being discouraged Rabbie pressed his ear to the door from outside. If it was something bad he’d leave them be, if it was something good, well…

 

“Tha lass wanted a love potion, said she needed somethin’ ta encourage a beau of hers,” Rabbie said, his eyes rolling dramatically at the notion of love.

 

“Is there such'a potion? I wouldna want a lass tae try it on me, but my grannie says the Sassenach is a _ban-druidh_ and -”

 

“I’ve told ye before to watch your tongue when it comes to that word.” Jamie snapped sharply at Rabbie, only to immediately regret doing so at seeing his face pale and his lip quiver. Jamie breathed the harshness out of his words in an exhale to a gentle tone and bended knee. “I’m sorry to have raised my voice to ye lad, but ye ken how dangerous it is to speak such a way around certain folk and to even accuse someone -”

 

“But I wasna! _Yer Sassenach_ is sae kind and sae lovely and smells good too and I dinna care if she is a ban-mmm.” Rabbie drew his lips in tight catching himself from speaking more.

 

 _“My Sassenach?”_ Jamie’s copper brows shot up while a flush of blood fastly crept up his neck to his ears in a ruby glow.

 

“Aye,” Rabbie said with a sweet grin that he thought the same as well. “That’s what gran says, and my mam and da, and Mr…”

 

“Alright! Back to work.” Jamie ordered with a chuck under Rabbie’s jabber of a chin. “I want to eat before nights upon us.”

 

Jamie set himself back to the strenuous task of removing the stump, hoping to rid himself of the strange heat that came from within that hadn’t come from labour, where his mind wondered back to what Rabbie had brought up to begin with. Laoghaire.

 

His sister Jenny and he hadn’t been on the best of terms since their father had past two years ago. At the most they were civil in regards to the land and tenants but nothing ever more then that until she began showing interest in who’d he take to wife. She saw it as carrying out the last of their fathers wishes, as a duitiful daughter unlike the good for nothing son that Jamie was and more. And he wouldn’t marry a lass because of just that.

 

So caught up in memories of the past Jamie didn’t notice that he was digging wildly until he uprooted a large clump of earth flinging it and nearly hitting wee Rabbie who fell flat on his rear as it whizzed by his nose, a hairsbreadth away.

 

“A Dhia! Did I hurt ye, _bhalaich?_ ” Jamie bent down to the lad, lifting his face to check for damage, but Rabbie was more concerned with the object that laid a foot away from him.

 

“What’s that, Laird?”

 

Jamie reached for the clump, dusting off the caked on muck before commenting, “Something that sure looks to taste like wickedness.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * Bhalaich - boy
> 
> *Ban-druidh - Witch


	3. Chapter 3

Claire woke up that morning knowing full well that this day was not meant for another mindless puttering around her house. No more rearranging the bottles and jars that lined her shelves from potency, to size, then back to their usual alphabetized, or one more read of the same old books, with the same damn pages that never turned with a fresh verse she hadn’t already memorized. Her bruises were gone, her arm was out of it’s sling, free from pain and her hand had healed nicely with just a pucker of pink for a scar.

 

So then, for the first time in nearly two weeks, Claire pulled her green cloak on, fastening the metal clasps together and grabbed her medicine box, small nicks marking the wood finishing here and there, with a rush of excitement flowing in her veins.

 

It was a day of bright sun that greeted Claire, with a crisp breeze that slipped past the wool fabric at her neck, leaving her with a pleasant trail of goosebumps as if nature itself was welcoming her back with a chilly kiss.

 

As she walked down the bumpy path Claire couldn’t help herself from hoping for something tremendously rousing to heal, though she wished no harm to come to her neighbors. Truly.

 

_Nothing too bad._ She assured to the one high above. _Just a scratch…that needs stitches. Or a leg needing to be reset, that would be just about heaven. I wonder what Mr. Fraser is up to?_ Claire mused with a laugh that colored her cheeks.

 

 

_____

 

 

It was the biggest boil she had ever seen, Claire concluded, as she brushed the strays from her face.

 

Mr. MacNab had seemed quite in awe of the size of the growth himself, proud almost. But it was a nasty looking thing protruding from his leg that pained him and his wife would have no more of his whining. However when Claire pulled out her roll of leather that contained her knives he suddenly realized the benefits of such an oddity. The stories he could tell, the people he could show…

 

He watched as Claire dragged her fingers over the different blades and Mr. MacNab wondered which she would use. The long curved one? Perhaps the one with jagged teeth that gleamed with a wink his way? Or a small saw hiding in the folds of her cloak? Rabbie told him she had one for severing infected limbs…

 

“Mebbe I could rub some oil on it, Mistress Beauchamp? Or joost crush the bugger back in, aye? Wouldna want tae distress ye, bein’ that yer barely on yer feet and all.”

 

“Well, if you want to baste it, fine. But there’s only one way to deal with a boil this size and that’s not by pushing the bugger back in. A simple slice and drain is all that’s needed.“ Claire then noticed the color of Mr. MacNab’s face drain to ashes when she picked up her knife and decided to give him some comfort the best way she knew how for a man. She let him drink from her flask of whisky until his nose shined red.

 

“Alright, Mr. MacNab, let’s get to it shall we?”

 

“Aye, ba dinna ‘ell da missus 'bout -” he lifted the flask with a shake to and fro, smiling sheepishly as he downed another dose. Doctors orders, ye ken?

 

 

____

 

De-boiled, cleaned and thoroughly soused, Mr. MacNab was sleeping peacefully on the floor of his kitchen which he assured was fit even for the Bonnie Prince. If that was good or bad Claire didn’t know, she couldn’t move him anyway if she tried. After cleaning her hands and tools, Claire gave Mrs. MacNab instructions for when her husband would wake.

 

“Now remember, if the incision begins to change to a darkening color and his skin becomes fevered, don’t hesitate to call on me.” Then Claire added for good measure. “And make sure your husband doesn’t pick at it, that’s how it got as big as it did.”

 

"Aye, Mistress, but I trust yer hand as a healer, there’s naught to worry about. Though -” Mrs. MacNab looked thoughtfully at her husband, loudly snoring, deep in sleep. “I’ll keep my broom at the ready if I so much as see that man o’ mine twitch.”

 

With laughter shared between the two, Claire was given the payment of a small bundle of apples,  much to her delight. She took her leave with a goodbye to the family - the large brood had been waiting outside during the procedure with wee Rabbie peaking through the window narrating, what he described as a most _gruesome scene_ , and were now all hovering over their soused father.

 

Outside, the air began to smell of dampness that was now graying the sky which would hinder Claire from continuing her rounds and had her stepping quickly home. But it was the sight before her that sent her mood plummeting to her feet and slowed her stride.

 

It was the Scot on his devil of a horse coming down the slope of hill, locking his blue eyes -that she could see even from where she stood - with hers. Claire then saw those same eyes darting around, expecting trouble that was always soon to follow and hers rolled hard in response.

 

It then surprised Claire that Jamie didn’t outright avoid her as he brought his horse to meet her. Out of politeness, possibly, but she took note of his appearance, purely from a healers eye if that’s what brought Jamie to her.

 

He was wearing the leather coat he seemed fond to wear that accented his shoulders, broad and looking well, with breeks that showed the long cut of his legs that made him tower over her, irritatingly so. The only dishevelment she could see was his hair, tussled from the wind making his copper locks even curlier then usual.

 

Jamie caught her stare with a queried cock of his brow as he brought Donas to a halt and Claire felt a sudden heat to her features that had her quick to find her voice.

 

“It’s been some time, Mr. Fraser. I hope you haven’t been misusing that shoulder of yours."Her hand moved to her hair, smoothing down what the wind had surely disrupted.

 

“I’m well, Sassenach. The oil ye gave me did me well but had me reeking to high heaven.” Jamie made an exaggerated face of offense Claire couldn’t help but find humourous that broke with a quirk of his mouth. “The _pigs_ were mighty jealous of me.”  

 

A flash of Jaime, arms flailing in terrifying fright, running away from the blood thirsty sow had Claire in stitches. Jaime just assumed she was laughing at his joke and feeling very pleased with himself, chuckled along with her until their laughter quieted.

 

“I heard from wee Rabbie you were on the mends and seein’ you now, ye look-” _Bonny_ "Verra well, Sassenach.”

 

“You speak to him about me?“ Claire assumed the worst, going over in her mind what had been said and done in Rabbie’s presence, with eyes narrowing and readying herself to pounce at the next sentence out of Jamie’s mouth.

 

“Just to know how ye were.” Jamie replied defensively while shifting in his saddle that had Donas grunting at his masters squirming.

 

“You could have stopped by, Mr. Fraser and seen me for yourself instead of having Rabbie be a spy for you.”

 

“I didna - I was only - what I meant was - ” _Breathe man and get out wit it._

 

“I was actually on my way to see ye, Sassenach.”

 

"Whatever for?”

 

A roaring crack of lightning startled them both and had Jamie patting down Donas who trembled at the sound. Then a faint drizzle soon fell down that had the twosome locking gazes.

 

“You can’t blame that one on me.” Claire remarked, pointing at the sky.

 

“I think mother nature is at fault here.” Even so Jamie cast a suspicious glance her way but fixed his gaze before she saw. He did come all this way for a reason.

 

"Ye canna travel in the rain even if its naught but a drizzle. Come.” Jamie said, extending his hand to her “I’ll take ye home as I was on my way there anyhow and I want no argument from ye either.”

 

Claire gave a doubtful shake of her head towards Donas, having little faith in a beast afraid of lightning. And more so to the idea of sharing a horse with Jamie.

 

“Dinna fash, Sassenach. Ye have nothing to fear. As long as I have the reins yer safe wi’ me.”

 

The air was thickening now with a frigid wind that sent a shiver up Claire’s spine and her limbs protesting the threat of a numbing and soaking.

 

Claire sighed a misty breath as she relented. “Alright, Mr. Fraser, my life is in your hands.”

 

“Tis how its been since we met, aye?” Claire would have been annoyed at the statement if not for the truth to what he said. Jamie afterall had given her a home all her own when she had nowhere else to go.

 

After taking her belongings from her, Jamie held out his palm once more for Claire to clasp on to and tentatively she did, as Jamie pulled her to his front between the press of his thighs and flush to his chest in a perfect fit of warmth that left any objections to the wind.

 

As they rode a gentle pace the light rain whimpered to a dew, yet neither made a move to stop their journey. There was still the cold wind to contend with, the mud to trod through and what if the rain picked up again? Instead they rode in companionable silence, which could only last so long for there was a problem.

 

Claire’s hair, always in defiance, was loosening from it’s pins, curling softly at his face that Jamie didn’t find unpleasant. Being so close he noticed she carried an earthly fragrance about her, with a whiff of a whisky aroma he found enticing that burned at his lips, that had his tongue peeking out to taste. Most of all though, Jamie could feel the shape of her as she gathered closer for warmth, from the arch of her back, to the swell of her hips, that left his belly to flip wildly in response. It was involuntary he reasoned, but if she continued pushing her arse against him like that -

 

Jamie’s breathing hitched, forcing him to clear his throat that sounded of a strangled toad.

 

“Are you coming down with a cold, Mr. Fraser?“ Claire asked with concern as she turned her head towards him. “Your breathing sounds troubling.”

 

Jamie put a smile on with an assurance that there was nothing ailing him, but Claire gave him a dubious look.

 

“What Sassenach? Do ye plan on doctoring me on my horse?”

 

Claire did just that and Jamie barely had enough time to pull at the reins.

 

She twisted her torso to face him, placing the back of her palm to lay against his stubbled cheek, trailing her fingers down to his chin and back again checking for a fever. Jamie was very warm, she assessed, with a countenance hued a vivid shade of pink, and his breathing was becoming increasingly heavier as well. She pursed her lips at the foolish Scot who dared to ride in damp weather. Claire told him just so too.

 

“I’m no’ sick, Sassenach, just a bit tired from the days work.” Jamie stuttered out as the feel of her touch lingered even as her hand was back in her lap. “Now turn yer head back round,” Jamie said lifting his head to the road, “And let’s get to yer cottage.”

 

He didn’t wait for a response and clicked his tongue in signal to Donas to move on ahead with a sudden jerk that had Claire leaning further back into the saddle.

 

_A Dhia_

 

____

 

Jamie made sure Donas was tied far away from Claire’s garden, lush from rain with no signs of the devastation from weeks earlier (which she made no comment to, most likely blaming the cotton tails for the loss).

 

He followed her in, minding the doorway as always, and set her things on the tabletop before sinking down to her kitchen chair. Jamie watched Claire as she removed her cloak and waved off her offer of tea, wanting to be gone before tragedy befell them. He never knew what fate had in store for him and Claire.

 

As if reading his mind Claire teased, “So what made you seek me out and face utter misfortune today, Mr. Fraser?”

 

“Well,” he began with a lopsided smile, “I was diggin’ out an ol’ tree stump when I found this -” Jamie pulled from his satchel, that laid at his feet, a large gnarled root cleaned from dirt. “It looked like something ye might grind in yer mortar so I brought it to ye thinking ye could use it somehow.”

 

Jamie handed her the root that she gave a curious glance to as she took her seat next to his. “Could ye use it as a plaster maybe? Or one of _yerr_ wicked concoctions ye _forrce_ down the _thrroat?_ “  He heavily rolled his R’s hoping to get a reaction from her unusually muted face. Was she pleased?

 

“You brought me a gift.” Claire was noticably touched by the gesture, her features softening that beckoned Jamie’s eyes to linger. _"Artium Lappa,_ ” she explained with a widening grin.

 

Jamie watched as Claire held it up to the light as if it were a precious gem, admiring the root for all the abilities it held beneath it’s coarse covering. She turned it round and round in her hands before scratching the outer surface of it and bringing it to her nose to smell it’s bitter tang that had her scrunching her nose up and furrowing her brow.

 

“Och, is it rotten then, Sassenach?“

 

"No, not at all. It’s pungent. Quite awful really,” Claire brought it to her nose for another whiff, inhaling deeply. "But the stronger the scent the more effective the remedy, as I’ve been known to say.” She rubbed her nose to rid the odor away and her smile returned.

 

“I believe I’ve been on the tail end of that old proverb from ye before.“ Jamie smirked. "So I did good?”

 

“Quite good.“ Claire agreed with a tilt of her head towards him. "I can’t remember the last time someone gave me such a lovely gift.”

 

_Shit_

 

“So this was what you wanted to see me for?”

 

“Well, no.” Jamie bowed his head, his fingers thumping against his thigh. “I - uh - wanted to ask about the lass who visited ye naught a week ago. _Laoghaire Mackenzie.”_

 

Any goodwill Jamie had earned was gone with a flash of her golden eyes ripe with a rising temper.

 

“And you thought to bribe me with this?” She gripped the root tight in her palms and Jamie truly feared he’d be missing teeth..if he could still walk.

 

“Honestly, do you think so little of me?” Claire didn’t know if she were upset, disappointed or both.

 

“Forgive me, Sassenach. But my sister -”

 

Claire’s demeanor calmed at hearing of his sibling. She had known about their history from the bits she heard during her rounds and was respectful enough not to ask for details. It wasn’t her place to pry. But she did know the mournful reason for their quarrels.

 

“She has it in her head that I must marry.” Jamie’s face was flushed from embarrassment but mostly from pure exasperation.“ I’ve told her often enough to keep her beak out of my affairs as I do hers, but now I see I have no other choice but to ask for yer aid.”

 

“My aid? Do you care for the girl?” Claire had no interest in matchmaking and her heart began to heighten it’s pacing at the thought of having to do so for Jamie.

 

“No, I dinna have a liking for the lass. But I heard she came to see ye and what she asked of ye.” Claire sighed, knowing exactly who Jamie heard it from.  

 

“Laoghaire did ask for you,.” She divulged. “Apparently she’s under the impression we’re quite friendly with each other.” Utter nonsense that would have had them throwing words of distaste at one another and probably would by the end of this conversation.

 

“She wanted to know if I could talk to you, to turn your heart towards her. I thought it was nothing but a misguided crush, so I told her it would be an ill fated union between you two and for her own sake she should look elsewhere for a beau.” Claire remembered her words had fallen from her lips without conscious thought and how Laoghaire glared at her not in broken-heartedness but of bitter determination. “Still the girl was adamant, so I gave her the bottle she asked for and showed her out.”

 

“You werena wrong.“ Jamie mumbled, avoiding her stare, focusing his own to his boots. Forgetting who he was let the words cascade from his mouth."I’m no one’s ideal match. But before my father passed he had been eyeing Laoghaire for me. He thought she would keep me rooted to these lands, a simple lass for a simple life, but I was having none of it. I wanted to travel, to see the world in any way I could.” A small grim smile crossed his face as the drumming of his fingers clenched into a fist. “I never did.”

 

“Now he’s gone and Jenny wants what my father wanted for me. That’s why she’s been speaking to the lass and the reason for her coming here. I’m a disappointment to her. I see it in her eyes, the way she avoids me And when I marry she’ll finally be done wi’ me.”

 

It was then Jamie felt the soft caress of a hand along his, gently urging his fist to loosen it’s grip and to raise his gaze where he found a pair of amber eyes emanating a kindness that eased the shame that had been crushing his heart.

 

“Whatever you think of yourself and despite what I may call you to your face or behind it.“ Jamie smiled weakly at that. "Believe me, when I say that you are a good man, Jamie Fraser. There aren’t many men like you in this world who have your sense of duty and honor and I doubt your sister is blind to those qualities so seldom seen in others.” Before Jamie could counter Claire squeezed his hand.

 

“How could she if I of all people see that in you.”

 

Letting her words seep in, Jamie flipped his hand so his palm enclosed over hers, lightly stroking the base of her thumb with the scar. His eyes never leaving their entwined hands, taking in the rarity of the intimacy of so simple an act.

 

“You’ve calmed my mind, Sassenach. I thank ye for taking pity on me.”

 

“I wasn’t speaking to you out of pity. It’s what friends do for one another.”

 

“Friends, aye? Is that what we are?” There was a glint  to his eyes cutting through the shade that once was there.

 

“Well, how would you describe us?”

 

“I dinna ken. But if ye are a friend then may I ask,” he leaned in close enough to her that she could feel his breath brush against her face. “What sorta things do ye say behind my back?”

 

She let out a belly laugh that cast a rosy glow about her features and Jamie didn’t know when he had seen her so genuinely happy in his presence.

 

“That you are a most ridiculous man.” Claire tugged at his auburn locks for emphasis that had Jamie twisting his face in mock pain.

 

“If I’m ridiculous then yer a foolish women for puttin’ up with me.” Jamie reciprocated her gesture and tugged at one of her own curls, marveling at how it sprung back as it slipped through his fingers. A true curly wig she was.

 

“I suppose I am.” They stared at one another with matching grins, becoming very aware of how much they were touching each other with familiarity. It was only when Claire felt the air becoming thin that she broke the moment.

 

“Mr. Fraser, about the aid you asked for..?”

 

“Och! Weel, I was hoping,” Jamie scratched at his stubble, clearly uncomfortable with the subject. “That maybe ye would tell my sister that I wasna fit to be a husband, in the way that matters, ken?” He wished for the roof to cave in now. Skull. Shatteringly. Hard.

 

Claire was too shocked to laugh, instead her mouth was left gaping wide. “You mean -”

 

“I was desperate! That’s why I brought ye that monstrosity and risked bodily injury seeking ye out. I needed Jenny to leave me be.” Jamie refused to meet her eye that shined with cruel amusement.

 

“Do you still need my assistance in that area?” She bit her lip, doing her best not to cackle at the sensitive matter.

 

“No.” Jamie narrowed his eyes at her delighted face. “It was mistake to ask ye and I hope this counts as one of yer confidential meetings.”

 

“Of course. As long as wee Rabbie isn’t behind that door your secret is safe with me.”

 

Standing to take his leave, Claire followed him to the door.

 

“Well, good luck with marriage woes, Mr. Fraser and -“ Claire paused, pressing her hand at his shoulder. "Talk to your sister, even if it’s like screaming to a redheaded wall, no matter how painful the conversation, she’s your only family and you need one another.”

 

“I’ll keep you in mind - your advice that is, Sassenach.” Jamie pressed his palm to hers for that last time and was about to turn the brass doorknob when one last question struck him.

 

“What was in the bottle ye gave her, Sassenach, if ye don’t mind me asking?” A mischievous smirk lit Claire’s face.

 

“The most important ingredient of all in a love potion. Shit.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

 

While Jamie had left Claire’s cottage with a lighter heart once alone in the big house memories of the past pervaded, cowering his mind and leaving him restless in bed where he thrashed about in battle with quilts wrapping around his limbs and his shirt twisting tight around his neck in a chokehold of heat.

 

Kicking the bedding off to the floor and nearly tripping from a foot caught in the folds with a mumble of gaelic frustration, Jamie sought to tire himself through a march down the hallways. His step, bare and cold, was the only echo in the hollowness of home, leading him past rooms he dared not venture into, down the stairs to the beckoning clank of glass that glimmered with amber.

 

A color that sent a wave of warmth to blush Jamie’s skin in a shiver before it ever touched his lips. That glow of richness embodied in a gaze, with a caress soft and lingering still, in a brush of a thumb against his cheek to the assuring touch of Jamie’s hands.

 

Jamie shook his head in a whirl of red to drive the feel of her away with a demand to, _“Get on wi’ it_ _man_ ,” downing the glass of whisky followed by another that did nothing but give his fingers a tremble to reach for another shot. But a whisper of touch called out to him, a promise to soothe his body and mind. So, with a scowl Jamie relented and allowed the vision of the woman forever tousled hair with spring to invade his senses once more, calming him of tension and easing his nerves of what must be done to fill his home with love once again.

 

“Maybe she is a witch.” Jamie thought wryly even as his eyes began to droop, but she was giving him what no God or saint had been able to.

 

Courage.

 

______

 

On the off chance Jamie’s wee fiend of a horse nipped his chances of redemption away, he left Donas behind in favor of his own two legs whose bones were quickly becoming melted with every step. It was a wonder to Jamie that he wasn’t on hands and knee by the time he finally reached his destination.

 

The Murray house was smaller then Lallybroch but for what it lacked in size it made up for in the single figure that sent a cold trickle of sweat down Jamie’s neck and his wame to flip nearly in a retch.

 

Jenny. Oblivious to him, walking to the back of her house with a basket leaning on her hip. Jamie quickened his step with a heart lodged in his throat and tongue thick in his mouth following her despite his bodies protest to make like Icarus and fly directly into the fiery sun. An alluring alternative.

 

Jenny was by herself, back facing Jamie when he made the final turn around the house. She was reaching above her head and pulling clothes from the line on the tips of her toes with a sway, the slight curve of his sister’s first child displacing her balance. Jenny placed her hand on the small swell within her, a smile so serene gracing her face as she whispered her love to the little life making itself known in the most beautiful of ways. A child whose existence Jamie had to hear from his cook.

 

Jamie made to step forward but felt his confidence waning in the spin of his heel wanting to dash back home when he saw Jenny perk her head up in awareness with a grunt, annoyed about being disturbed from her task at hand. Jamie watched as she gave her belly a small stroke with a promise to continue their talk later, her wee one responding back in such a way that softened her irritation as she turned his way. The light beaming from within faded from her face, as her body stiffened at the sight of him.

 

“Oh, it’s you.” Jenny spoke curtly. “I thought it was Ian needin’ me. I’ll fetch him for ye.” She bent to grab her half filled basket of sheets with a hurried hand when Jamie prevented her from doing so.

 

“Janet, it’s you I wish to speak to.” Jamie’s voice wavered with a pitch that cracked and him clearing his throat. But his eyes were lit with determination and focused on his sister as he closed the distance between them, making Jenny squirm where she stood and avoid his gaze entirely to her shoons.

 

“My day is full enough with chores and it isna even noon yet. Another time, no’ now.” Jenny made to move past him but Jamie placed a palm to her shoulder,  his touch so foreign to her now that it made her flinch and he to drop his hand with an apology.

 

“I need to say my peace with ye. Please, _piuthar._ “

 

Jenny clenched the basket in her hands till her knuckles paled to white. She didn’t want to speak of this again. To feel the remorse sickening inside her. To remember her brothers voice like that of a pleading child, so broken and alone.

 

“No! It’s better if we let it lie. I canna live through it again.” 

 

_Flashback_

_Two years ago  
_

_Jamie knew what was expected of him as future laird, the responsibility of the title weighed heavy on his shoulders from the day his elder brother, William died. His father Brian had kept him close to home, only allowing Jamie leave to foster with his Uncle Dougal and then onward to Castle Leoch to further his education. But it wasn’t enough for Jamie. He wanted to see the world, experience the wonder and adventures that existed beyond the borders that held him prison to the land. Jamie wanted freedom, however brief, no matter how selfish it seemed._

 

_The opportunity for such a chance came in the form of a war._

 

_Ian, his friend since childhood, was leaving for France as a mercenary and while Jamie never had a lust for bloodshed the opportunity to be at his braithair of his hearts side surpassed any hesitance on his part to join Ian. Not only because he had lost two siblings at so young an age, or from a rush of excitement to travel, but for the sake of Jenny. Both sister and mother to Jamie she had mourned just as deeply as him from the unrelenting loss of family in their lives and he had vowed as a lad she would never know grief again. Even in the face of war Jenny’s happiness greatly outweighed his fathers anger by far in Jamie’s mind._

 

_When Jamie told his father of his plans, Brian threatened to lock him in his room and take a strap to his arse till it shined raw if he set foot out of the house. So Jamie snuck away in the middle of the night, leaving a note for his father begging him to understand his duty as a man and left with Ian who was waiting for Jamie with horses down the road, his own guilt over his role in the matter showing nervously on his face._

 

_Upon finding an empty room when dawn broke the sky and reading the note on his sons bedside table, Brian ran for the stairs hesitating at the top, lost in a dizzy spell so much worse then the others before, struggling for a breath that would never come that stilled his heart to a fall down to the bottom of the stairs to never wake again. It was Jenny who had found Brian’s broken, lifeless body first, just like she had with Willie all those years ago slumped over in his bed and her mother whose heart faded away under her ear._

 

_Word didn’t reach Jamie for a week._

 

_He wasn’t even off his horse before Jenny was slamming her fists and curling her nails to rip any part of her brother that was bared to her, swearing at him with all the hate she had in her soul to damn him for their fathers death. And Jamie accepted every blow of fist and scream, letting Jenny take her anger out on him while he cried for forgiveness over and over again until his throat was swollen, dropping to his knees with his body shaking from fatigue and anguish. Jenny, with rage overwhelming every second she stared at Jamie, left him on the spot to wallow in his shame and didn’t look back._

 

_For the third time in his life, Jamie had lost a sibling._

 

_Over the course of those endless first months of sorrow words were barely spoken and those that were had been bitter with spite towards Jamie even as Ian had been slowly forgiven but not her own brother. That was the final straw that broke him and drove a sharp thorn of resentment to embed itself deep within Jamie that now extended to Ian. Yet it was Ian who got Jenny to acknowledge him again with civility following later but the wedge was still there, deeply carved like a charm to the very day._

 

_End of Flashback  
_

Jamie fell to his knees in an act of repentance with his head cast down and hands tightly fisted, digging hard into themselves til he felt them crack.

 

“I ken I’m the reason father isna here with us and I have lived with that guilt everyday knowing that my very presence pains ye. But I miss ye sister, yer all I have left, my very heart.”

 

“Oh, _mo chridhe_!” Jenny dropped to her own knees, cradling the curve of Jamie’s head to her shoulder as he shook from sobbing. “It’s me who should be begging forgiveness of ye, for my cruelty towards ye. I kent full well I was the reason for ye leaving and I took it out on ye when it was me to blame for it all.”

 

Jamie was stunned by her words, the embrace he found himself in, the tips of his sister’s fingers digging painfully into his scalp as if he’d pull away. As if he would want to. He took hold of Jenny, so much smaller then he remembered, mindful of the bump between them.

 

“But if I had just stayed put like Da ordered he’d still be here.” Jamie croaked that was muffled in the press of his head in the shelter of her shoulder.

 

Jenny pushed Jamie away to cup his face, forcing his gaze to meet hers. "Ye ken how how father struggled after Willie passed and then mam with the bairn.” Jenny’s eyes were puffing to a pink with a sniffle that tickled her nose but the tremor in her voice was calming to a steady force that sounded so like love to Jamie. "It was going to happen Jamie whether ye left or no’ and I took it out on ye because there was no one else to. Made ye hate me as much as I hated myself.”

 

Jamie furrowed his brow as his chest lurched in another aching upheaval. “I could never hate ye, Jenny. But ye’ve avoided me with barely a word passed between us all this time.” Though Jamie knew he had done the same to her.

 

“I thought I had pushed ye too far, that I lost ye and I couldna mend what was broken. That’s why I thought a lass could help ye where I couldna. The last I could do for ye and father.” She said with a gloss of eye that threatened another fall to cheek. “He loved ye so, Jamie. Still loves ye wherever his soul is and I think the only regret he has is not tanning that hide of yers. Mine too come to think of it.“

 

"Aye, yer right, head full of hay he used to say of us.” They both laughed through tears at the memory of their father throwing his hands in the air in exasperation asking for his wife in heaven for strength.

 

“It’s just the two of us Frasers now and I promise ye _braithair_ I willna have another day of strife between us.” Jenny used the cuff of her sleeve to wipe away the stains from Jamie’s face. “Now help yer sister to her feet.”

 

And just like that Jamie was a brother again and plucked his sister off the ground beneath them.

 

“No’ just the two of us, Jenny.“ His hand hovered over her belly in question until she pressed it gently to the bump where for the first time Jamie felt the presence of his niece or nephew that gave him a face splitting grin. "Ye’ve got a wee Fraser bairn in ye, hopefully wi’ more brain then hay.” Jamie teased.

 

“Lord help my sanity, yer right.” Jenny grinned, rolling her eyes that reminded Jamie the way their father would so often do, giving him a chuckle.

 

“Come inside, Jamie. Ian will probably faint from seeing us two together.“

 

Arm and arm, brother and sister walked together with their hearts at peace with one another.

 


	5. Chapter 5

The room at the top of the stairs was still and quiet where the only disturbances were wisps of grey smoke from a dying fire that weaved through the air and the dimming light of an oil lamp beside an open book left unread.

 

Jamie had taken to reading the bible every morning the way his father, Brian had done. Words of wisdom had fortified him through every trial that crossed the threshold of their home, guided him to care for his family the way the Lord saw fit and gave him the strength to continue onwards to a new day despite the pieces of his heart loss to in the depths of the earth. Again and crushingly again. Jamie had taken solace in the weathered pages of scripture himself, hoping that it would instill in him the ways to be like his father.

 

But today, this morning, once again, Jamie's thoughts turned not to his duties, but to a woman. A Sassenach.

 

The sense of need to have Claire's touch upon him baffled Jamie and thrilled him all at once. They were sparks of a feeling he had felt when he first saw Claire, an unearthly thing walking towards him from stories of old through the green bush and trees that split the grim sky with sun. Jamie had felt a flutter of warmth from somewhere unknown deep inside at the sight of her, but then -

 

Then he was nearly impaled by her just moments after meeting and Jamie realized it was trouble of bodily harm his body was warning him of. At least that's what he had told himself through the pain and humiliation at her feet.

 

Jamie passed his palms over his face, straight through his hair in raked dishevelment, with a throaty groan that bellowed loudly from his mouth. _What was the use of mulling over a daft Sassenach, anyhow?_

 

He closed the good book and walked over to the vanity, taking stock of his features and finding himself agreeable, Jamie headed for below wanting to fill his stomach rather than his head of anymore nonsense. He trampled down the stairs three steps at a time, making a racket with each landing as he swerved towards the enticingly sweet aromas from the kitchen making his stomach, already twisting with hunger, roar in anticipation of a hearty meal to start his day.

 

There was Jenny - only a week since their reconciliation and ever-present now but still a surprise so early in the morning - in her dark green homespun and stirring a pot of parritch with Mrs. Fitz close beside her, tasting the thick concoction. With their backs to him Jamie began devising a plan on how best to snatch a piece of bannocks - sitting on the table tempting him to thievery - when the older woman voiced her awareness of his presence.

 

"Jamie lad, ye wouldna be eye'n those bannocks now would ye?"

 

"Never in life, Mrs. Fitz." Jamie walked to the sweet statured woman and gave her a lofty kiss on the cheek and then another to the top of his sister's head of smooth black hair done up in twirl of bun that smelled of roses like their mother.

 

"Just came to see if you ladies needed assistance." They huffed at that but Mrs. Fitz gave Jamie a nod to stuff his mouth with a _single_ helping of bread, but not to test his luck or her good nature with a second.

 

"Brought ye some jars of honey there on the table - a good batch too. The bees have been gorgin' 'emselves on lavender and wild flowers makin' that honey there taste like beauty itself. "The jar was already in Jamie's hand, the cloth lining acing as a lid set aside with bread ready for dipping when Jenny piped up from her place at the stove.

 

"Where did yer granddaughter get to, Mrs. Fitz?" Jamie's hand froze midair as he looked over at Jenny whose back was _innocently_ turned away from him, surely over stirring the porridge to a paste.

 

"My Laoghaire surprised me this mornin'." Mrs. Fitz informed Jamie when she saw his confused face. "Said she wanted to bring me a bit o' sunshine." She then pointed to the large bundle of bright colored flowers gracing the windowsill. "I'll fetch her to say her regards. Lass is probably oot the door seein' to yer beasties she's sae fond of."

 

"No ye dinna have to -" Jamie stammered out but the older woman was already out the back door in a sweep of her voluminous skirts and a hand to her mouth with a holler carried into the air.

 

"Did ye ask the lass to come?" Jamie casually asked while wiping his hands of crumbs along his breeks. He didn't want to have this conversation, one where the Fraser temperament could brew quick to a boil between the two of them.

 

"No, just a warning to ye braithair. But my opinion of her is the same." Jenny said with the same strive for calm as Jamie while turning his way. "Laoghaire thinks the world of ye, Jamie. Wants to make ye a home, give ye children, be a wife for ye. _Yers._ Don't ye want that?" Jenny reached for her brother, truly wanting to know what it was he wanted if not a wife.

 

"Jenny, ye ken what a woman says to her ardent lover, or in this case his sister, should be written in wind and running water." Jamie recited a verse from his youth hoping to elicit a laugh from Jenny and end the discussion. Instead he only provoked her, her nails digging deep in his arm causing him to jerk in her grasp with an, _Ifrinn,_ passed through his teeth.

 

"Aye, make jokes Jamie. Ye won't listen to me ye'd rather be off rolling in the heather with the Sassenach wouldn't ye?" Jamie tensed under her hands.

 

“Are ye accusing me of taking Claire to bed, Janet?” Jamie's gaze flashed a disturbance that darkened the blue of his eyes and what Jenny couldn't believe was that it was over the Sassenach.

 

“Claire now is it?"Jenny eyed her brother sharply. "Ye ken what folk say about her, Jamie? About the two of ye?" Jamie tried to move away from her, not wanting to hear anymore, but his sister was latched on tight, slight as she was.

 

"I kept quiet when ye brought her here, the woman being a fine healer and all, but lately brathair, yer heids been in the clouds. Ye used to avoid the lass and now from what I hear ye've taken to going to her home at all hours of the day."Jenny spoke accusingly. "I dinna ken if yer doing this to spite me or if my clotheid of a brother has lost his heart to a Sassenach."

 

Jamie stayed quiet for a moment, his features hooded from inquiry no matter the penetrative stare that sought to see the truth in his eyes.

 

“She's a widow who needs help from time to time with me the only one to provide and whenever I leave her presence it's with half the hair I started wi' if I'm lucky. Say what ye want about me, ye do often enough, but don't go tarnishing a good woman's reputation, Janet based on gossip. She hasna earned yer scorn only yer respect."

 

Jenny let out a sigh of resignation, a long winded one too since Jamie didn't address her last comment.

 

"I apologize to ye, brathair. Ye have enough on yer shoulders and now I'm only adding to it."

 

Jamie gave his sister a gentle shake of her shoulders. "Ye are as any sister brings. But trust me to know my own heart and to respect my choices. I'm fine as I am without need for a wife."

 

Needing one last jab as sisters do, Jenny's lips curled up into an impish grin. “Weel, tell that to Grannie MacNab. She's been eyen' ye since ye turned sixteen.”

 

"Grannie McNabb changed my nappies." Jamie grimaced with a shudder but happy her mood had shifted to teasing him.

 

"Aye, so she has first call on ye." Jenny replied back with a laugh that only intensified as her brother pinched at her.

 

Then from the doorway Mrs. Fitz popped her head in with a call. "The stramash done wi' then, dearies?"

 

______

 

As Jamie walked outside his lungs filled not with the fresh morning breeze of pine and grass but with the unmistakable stench of shit.

 

"Ifrinn!"

 

Repulsed by whatever creature tainted his doorway, Jamie bent over to check his boots of excrement when he heard someone clear their throat.

 

Jamie looked up to see the young lass with smooth moonbeam hair and rosy cheeks beaming at him with want and expectation that reached her pale blue gaze directed solely at him. He gulped nervously at the attention.

 

“Good mornin' to ye, Jamie.” Laoghaire chirped, interrupting thoughts of brotherly vengeance. She was surrounded by two slop mouthed heathens disguised as dogs, _Elphin_ and _Bran,_ that were pawing at her and inhibiting her from walking more then a few steps.

 

 _"Sheas, mo lùghdaich!"_ Jamie commanded and the two hounds settled down but stayed at her skirts with tails whipping madly in anticipation of a treat.

 

"It's fine, Jamie. My own fault for feeding them sweeties." Laoghaire patted their heads affectionately leaving them to whine at not being rewarded with food. "I was just on my way back home, mam will get fashed thinkin' I've been dragged away by redcoats." She took a step closer to him nearly tripping over the dogs. "Would ye walk wi' me Jamie, to see me safe?" Laoghaire asked shyly.

 

While there had only been a few occasions for the patrol to pass on Jamie's lands and even then only on the outskirts, he wasn't willing to risk the young girls safety for the inconvenience of it.

 

“Aye, if I must," he replied reluctantly. "I'm the reason ye came, I wont be the reason for any damage to come yer way.” Laoghaire felt her cheeks stain an ugly shade of red that he had seen through her _carefully_ laid plan and simply nodded her head, chewing her lower lip, in thanks.

 

It was uneasy walking with Laoghaire. She would sneak looks at Jamie, opening her mouth to speak only to falter that had her looking like a gaping trout and she was fiddling with her fingers, twisting them to the point that Jamie was sure they'd snap off. So to ease the awkwardness Jamie brought up conversation of the animals that she was so fond of. He recalled when they were younger how Laoghaire tried to hide a rabbit in her bonnet, becoming frustrated when the wee thing tried to escape.

 

"I'd never seen someone get so angry wi' such a wee fluff. You nearly smothered the puir thing to death." Jamie was howling loudly that choked harshly in his throat when he saw her face downcast in sadness. Laoghaire kindly reminded him that she was hiding the rabbit from her father's blade and had been desperate to save the animal she had grown so fond of. Jamie laid a hand to her shoulder with a gentle squeeze and apologised for his thoughtless remark. Laoghaire glanced at his hand, innocent in gesture but lingering enough to encourage a warmth to spread across her being, she had barely brushed her finger tips against his knuckles, rough and dusted with copper, when he pulled away.

 

Flustered with a hitch in her voice, Laoghaire asked if Jamie remembered how he hid the rabbit in his father's barn for her, where the animal nibbled at the hay and stolen carrots from his mother's garden. Jamie screwed his brows trying to capture the image that was nothing but a wispy haze of Laoghaire's puffed cheeks and the thumping legs of the rabbit trying to break free from her embrace. She pressed Jamie further, reminding him how he wiped her tears away with the corners of his sleeve, giving his oath of protection as future laird to the little soul that nuzzled at their hands.

 

Jamie shook his head, the memory lost to him.

 

He quickly spoke of their common interest in horses, finding safe ground to talk one another without fear. Once she had calmed Jamie found Laoghaire to be pleasant and discovered she had a mind outside of her interest in him that held a keen eye for farmlife. He began to see why his sister was convinced she would do him well.

 

Jamie could almost imagine the life that was beginning to paint itself before him. A caring wife who would tend to his every need with a kiss in the morning and whatever he pleased at night. Where conversation would revolve around pleasantries and horses...dogs…

 

Yes, Laoghaire was likable, more then Jamie thought she would be, but that was the extent of his feelings. Not like the bewilderment of emotions causing him havoc of late that Jamie had belittled and wished would pass. But his walk with Laoghaire made him realize he had to see Claire, to get himself sorted of whatever she had awakened in him that was fast becoming an affliction.

 

They came upon her home, a tidy wee thing, when Laoghaire asked, while threading her fingers through her hair that danced lovely on the wind, "Would ye like to come in?"

 

"No' today lass, there's something that needs my attention that I must see to."

 

"Maybe I could help ye." She timidly layed her hand on his arm feeling the strong breadth of him that tensed beneath her touch. Her smile was hopeful, pleading.

 

 _Puir lass._ Jamie thought as he gave her hand a soft tap before removing it. "Tis no concern of yers but thank ye for the walk it did me some good." His word of gratitude sent Laoghaire's heart soaring as if he called her a beauty he could not live without. But as they said their goodbyes, Laoghaire watched the man she had dreamed of calling hers walk towards the thicket of trees where there was only a single path with one destination at it's end. The flicker in her heart, that surged with love burned to ash that scattered to blacken her sky.

 

_____

 

Jamie came to the clearing where Claire's little cottage stood, with a roof that tilted slightly to one side no matter how many times he took his hammer to it. Smoke from the chimney signaled she was home and Jamie found himself quickening his stride in anticipation of seeing her hawkeyes that could all at once cut a man down to his shins and whisk him to the highest peaks with joy.

 

He wondered how her gaze would fall on him now. More often than not it held an annoyance and amusement at his own expense and a smugness that knew no bounds, chin proudly held high. Though the last Jamie saw her, a genuine kindness had enveloped Claire's features, softened her in a way that had never been extended to him.

 

Jamie wondered if those eyes would reflect the look his own shone now. A curious eagerness to know a person in all ways.

 

"I've been bewitched and I don't half mind." The realization and acceptance was oddly soothing to him.

 

Before Jamie could knock on the door he could hear her voice beyond carried in the breeze, following it he found Claire on her knees in the dirt with a small pile of uprooted plants in a basket at her side. If they were weeds or the wee bit of greens she was accustomed to eating (like a coo? Jamie had questioned once before and received his first blithering arse if memory served him right.) he did not know. What caught his attention however, was the fact that Claire was having a conversation with her greenery and verra cross with them by the sound of it.

 

“Oh, you filthy little beasts feeding on poor Tom," Claire hissed as she took her hand shovel to the slugs, ending their feast in the most satisfactory way judging by the extra swivel of the wrist she gave to the slimy pests.

 

Well, if his mind was truly gone he'd be in good company.

 

Jamie leaned forward against the wooden fence that he himself had put up, careful of splinters that still gave his fingertips a stinging twinge.

 

"Ye give yer bitty greens names, Sassenach?" Jamie asked, causing Claire to let out a yelp and snap the stalk of her plant in half.

 

"Did ye just murder poor Tom?" Jamie was in pure enjoyment. Too much, Claire noted with a deepening scowl once she turned to see his face shining with delight.

 

"It's _Tormentil_ you sneak and he has a fleet of brothers and sisters to mourn him because of you." Claire tossed the mangled plant directly at his idiotic grin that he dodged with a tilt of his head.

 

"If that's the case I offer my apologies to the late Mr. Tormentil." Jamie then gave a courtly bow to the deceased at his boots and despite herself, much to her amusement as she hid whatever was blooming at her lips with a roll of her eyes.

 

"You are an arse." She stood, dusting the dirt off her skirts.

 

"Arse is it?" Jamie lifted a ruddy brow with a smile still tugging at the corners. "I thought ye regarded me as yer friend?"

 

"Which I'm now sorely regretting." Claire crossed over to the other side of the fence, basket in hand, while surveying Jamie's person. His demeanor was usually that of a brooding mule whenever he found himself within range of her. Now however, there was a lightness of spirit about him that smoothed the lines of strain etched in the skin across his face. He looked almost happy here with her. But, Claire reminded herself, there was only ever one reason that Jamie would choose to seek her out.

 

"What brings you here anyway?" She put a finger to her chin, tapping it in mock contemplation. "Did Donas finally kick you in the rear?" Claire leaned over to see the appendage in question only for Jamie to sidestep himself from her wandering eyes into the railings.

 

“My arse is fine. _For now_." Claire's eyes narrowed at Jamie's emphasis and wondered how much more weight the fence needed before giving out.

 

"I just came by to risk it and thank ye for yer guidance. I spoke to my sister and - weel, I'm verra happy and indebted to ye, Sassenach."

 

"That's wonderful!" Claire beamed, reaching for his forearm before a hasty retreat to the back of her nape. “I'm happy for you, truly so. But you don't owe me a thing, I'm only glad that I didn't overstep my place."

 

Eyes pinned at her hand in admitted regret for lost of touch Jamie replied with a shake of his head. "Nay, for once yer opinion was welcomed. Even with Laoghaire in a way."

 

"Laoghaire? Did she give up one you then?" Claire asked, mildly curious .

 

"No' exactly. She came to me just this morning and I walked her home. Twas pleasant." A lopsided grin formed as to why it was so. "I used to think she was empty heided when I was a lad but there's more to her than I gave her credit for."

 

"Do you plan on announcing the engagement on quarter day then, Mr. Fraser?" Claire asked, her tone sharp when she had meant for a tease that caused a puzzlement at Jamie's countenance.

 

"No, I don't." He stated firmly and more so as he continued. "And call me Jamie. Ye did the other day and I found it _verra_ fine.”

 

With a smile shy, that Jamie didn't know she was capable of she did. "Alright, Jamie then." Saying his name aloud gave them both a pleasant shiver. "I suppose I should reciprocate and have you call me Claire.”

 

“I thought ye liked Sassenach."

 

"Not always. Some here spit it like the insult it is." Seeing Jamie's expression to press her for names she added only a few. "But I don't mind it from you. It's what you called me from the first."

 

"Och, you were always a Sassenach to me, accent or no."

 

And that was the truth as Jamie recalled that day of shoveling hay, how at first sight of her the cloak she wore had been dirtied at the hem, her dress of heather fraying at the edges and her only bag, a scanty thing worse for wear. Even her hair of richly earth was a mads of frazzled curls pulled loose in a bun to match her state. Yet it had laid like a fairy crown atop her head, with the tendrils framing her face like ivory, fine and smooth, and Jamie couldn't quite focus when she reached him from her realm of trees and asked his name.

 

Her voice was serious, with eyes weary. She had obviously been on her feet for some time and had no time for idleness. Made more clearer by the hand at her waist, the the line of lips. Jamie had given his name with a bow of service to her needs.

 

Her whole being relaxed in relief that spread to every point of her in happiness, in a smile wide in radiance and James Fraser felt as if she had kissed him on the spot.

 

“I have been in search of you, Mr. Fraser. I hear you are in need of someone with my talents.” Claire pressed forward a hand out to him, a gesture he found odd for a woman that only suited get more.

 

“Have ye now, _Sassenach?"_ And then Jamie remembered how he closed the gap between them and when his footing had taken a slip, hidden slickness under the hay…

 

"Next I find myself on the ground covered in mud wi' a broken foot and you hovering above me calling me a clumsy _oof."_ Jamie tapped the tip of his foot to the ground, wincing at the memory.

 

“You're still an _oof_ if you blame me for your clumsiness and it was a mild strain you child.” Claire circled her eyes in a scoff for a second time with him and if they kept on she was sure to near the record of an eyesore five.

 

"If I recall right ye tried to gut me too."

 

Claire was now at the spinning round of three as Jamie poked his middle in a stabbing motion.

 

"I was trying to help you!"

 

"With a pitchfork?!"

 

Claire had grabbed the pitchfork that he was holding on to as he was falling to help him balance but the pronged ends had spun around to face him and... well...at least she missed.

 

Claire gave him a sheepish look coupled with a shrug, as Jamie gave in to a slight chuckle at the moment that sealed their fate of ill luck with one another.

 

"You looked like a piglet you know, head to toe covered in filth." Claire tipped her basket at his leg and he gave it a gentle knee back to her.

 

"Did I? Fit for the pin I s'pose."

 

"You'd be in good company with your sow unless she tried to nip you again and -" Further words died in the air as realization hit her.

 

“Again? What do ye mean..?” Slowly Claire felt herself flushing red from face to neck that grew to a purple, followed by the most joyous laughter she hadn't felt in ages. Jamie's nostrils flared, his own shade matching hers for an entirely different reason.

 

“Was it Rabbie?" Jamie asked, knowing the answer already despite Claire's denial of him doing so. But who else had a mouth that never ceased to close.

 

That lad!

 

"Well dinna get too smug, Sassenach, he had an awful lot to say 'bout ye.” Jamie warned in increasing irritation.

 

"Like what?" The words came out in squeaks as Claire tried to compose herself. She was completely unconvinced of his threat.

 

Jamie racked his brain, searching for fault that he hadn't already thrown her way. The worst Rabbie had ever revealed to him was how Claire had a habit of humming to herself, something about the sea he had said. Jamie was left to answer with the only dirt he had on her.

 

"Nothin' so fair daft as you carrying on with yer Mr. Tom."

 

But he should of known better than to insult a gardners plants that were equal to flesh.

 

Claire went for a swipe at Jamie's head with her basket, along with the contents of prickly plants and a single turnip that distracted his vision (particularly the turnip). So she swung back again swearing better aim, only to be caught by her slight wrist high in the air, the basket falling from her grasp and her tumbling straight to Jamie's chest. Hard lines of taut muscle pressed against the soft curves of her breast and hips with every heaving breath that brushed against their faces, mere inches apart.

 

Claire willed her body to pull away but defiant it stayed as his did to hers, so with a voice faint and high she barely managed a weakly plea.

 

“Mr. Fraser -”

 

“Jamie." He reminded in so low a timbre that carried across Claire's skin to glow a rosy hue. Jamie reached tentatively for her face, his fingertips grazing her neck as he thumbed away a smudge at her chin that tugged at her lips, parted just as his. It trailed up to rest at her cheek where he looked rather fondly at her.

 

"Did ye always have freckles, Sassenach?" But more than that Jamie noticed the fine arch of her brow, how her eyes had flecks of captured sun in them, and how the blush that warmed his palm was now mirrored in the curve of her breasts.

 

"No, they were licked on by a _coo."_ Claire meant to mock Jamie's accent, a sure way she thought to break whatever tangled them together, but his eyes continued to dart over her features, as her own did the same. To every small nick she had never noticed before, to the stray leafs caught in those fiery locks where underneath laid the bloom of a bump and then the color of his eyes bluer then any wonder she had ever seen that brewed such a sudden tenderness that was Claire's final undoing.

 

Claire pushed away, her mind snapping back to where the sky above was grey even as her heart was still beating to a maddening hymn. Looking down she saw why as their hands were still intwined, gently enough for her to sever, gently enough that she was strangely hesitant to do so.

 

"Will ye come to Lallybroch for tea, Sassenach?" The voice that interrupted her thoughts was strained as if he hadn't spoken for centuries but the earnest intent was clear to her.

 

"Why?" Claire asked breaking the contact fully now as she wrapped her arms around her middle.

 

"Friends speak to one another 'bout their days joys and grievances." Jamie answered perplexed. He had been encouraged by her reaction to him but now..

 

"What if I don't want to share a thing?" She pressed.

 

"Then come to tea anyways where I'll do all the talking. I shall regale ye of all the Scottish tales yer English upbringing is lacking."

 

"And where do we go from there?"

 

"If ye find me agreeable then maybe ye can invite me for a walk to forage for yer wee herbs where you can judge my intelligence. I suspect ye'd like that greatly, Sassenach." She bit her lip, trying to contain the crack of a smile that he spurred which only encouraged Jamie to give her more honesty.

 

"I would like to know you, Claire Beauchamp and I'd like for ye to know me as well."

 

"What if I'm not ready for tea today or even in a week?"

 

"Then I will have to do without. I'm a very patient man when properly motivated." The choice was hers to make. To press the friendship that she herself had given name to forward. But a deep rooted doubt that had plagued her mind since what seemed like always took hold like weeds, numerous and unrelenting, reminding her of what had always been her downfall.

 

"I take no offense if ye rather not, Claire." Jamie said as he observed the shade of doubt cripple her face. "Dinna feel I'm forcing ye as laird to accept."

 

"I didn't think you were it's just - shouldn't it be storming hail and thunder with you falling in a bush of nettles cursing me to the devil who created me?" She half laughed at the absurdity of her words but to them it was a reality and a common one at that. Even so Claire's hold of her waist slackened as Jamie with the lightest of touches, reached out to hers.

 

"I've wondered that myself but here we are limbs and all and the only thing at risk is a bit of our pride." He stroked the scar at her open palm with a soft press of his thumb as calloused as it was.

 

"Lets stop expecting the worse of each other, Claire. The last time we did is still wi' me and is the reason I want to know ye. Besides I already stepped in shit, independent from seeing ye today, maybe our misfortunes are in our past." He attempted what she could only surmise was a wink in the most peculiar of ways that brought the shine back to her face and him feeling a surprising joy at being able to do so.

 

Claire shook her head, more at herself for the foolishness that was enveloping her and gave Jamie a squeeze of palm in decision.

 

"You are a most ridiculous man, James Fraser. Yes, I will have tea with you."

 


End file.
